Hell Phone

So, I finally got a cell phone. I know, I know, it’s about damn time. Dunno what took me so long, despite its unnecessarity to me. (No, it’s not a real word. Shut up.) See, thus far it’s created more problems than it’s worth:

First I had to program my contact (singular; I don’t know many people), which is a simple procedure that took no less time and effort than running a successful presidential election. Once that was finished, I needed a good ringtone; the ones included just don’t cut it. I chose the best song ever, and then downloaded it to my computer.

Silly me. See, I assumed that since I had a computer, and my computer had a USB port, and my phone had a USB port, that I would be able to connect the two. Y’know, with a USB cable. Apparently, this is not the case. Apparently, the onlly way to get a ringtone is to first download an application that allows you to download ringtones, then pay them the company (I won’t reveal the name, but it rhymes with “Horizon”) a minor fee of $5.99. Um. WHAT?

See, I HAD the song. It was MINE. I could access it AT ANY TIME via COMPUTER. I didn’t WANT to get it via “Horizon”; I doubt they would even HAVE it. This made me ANNOYED, so much so that I resorted to CAPITAL LETTERS.

I ended up getting it eventually from some website that texts you the song as an attachment. Which still wasn’t free; texts weren’t included in the phone’s plan, so each one (I had to receive two for this tone) cost a quarter. It’s a much better price, but still.

Now, the reason i didn’t get texts is because my family already had an existing plan, which didn’t include them. I could have added them for $5.99 a month (a familiar figure, to say the least), but then I would have had to pay it (My phone was 100% free; everything was already being paid for in the existing plan), which I didn’t want to do because I’m saving up for Star Wars: The Force Unleashed, which came out this week.

In case you forgot, this was a post about how I wanted to get a ringtone without paying for it, which was an impossibility because I didn’t want to pay fifty frickin’ cents, because I’m saving up for another stupid, violent, mind-numbing video game.

Don’t you love me?

PS:these people should receive millions of dollars.